i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
is it fun? or sober?
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
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