Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Randomize
