doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
You need Xanax blowdarts
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
