I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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