Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
As shirtless as possible
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
