I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
