some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
