Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
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