OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Randomize
