yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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