a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
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