dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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