He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
