That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
