How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
Randomize
