when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
