I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
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