She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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