Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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