What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
