So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Randomize
