you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
