I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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