I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
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