How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Randomize
