Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
