Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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