I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Randomize