I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
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