there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future�
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Randomize
