U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Randomize
