Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(512): View more from Texas

She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."

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(612): View more from Minnesota

Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.

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(217): View more from Illinois

I will never swim in a flooded basement again..

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(574): View more from Indiana

im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven

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(702): View more from Nevada

we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.

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(917): View more from New York City

You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.

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(289): View more from Ontario

you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window

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(607): View more from New York

She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.

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(808): View more from Hawaii

I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.

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