So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
