Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
