I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
