you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize