brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
is this the sara with the beer cane?
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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