Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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