She said her name was "party"
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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