I wish I could punch you in the face.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
how drunk are you?
Several
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
