you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
