a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
