I will die if light touches me.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Randomize
