i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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