How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
