Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Randomize
