yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
