walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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