That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize
