i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
